Not a Knit: The Fuck Book

I’ve always loved seeing traditionally feminine things with irreverent phrases on them. It takes all the ‘You should act like a young lady’ training that I got as a child, and turns it on its head. I heard Dame Judy Dench embroiders bad words in gorgeous hoops, and I had an old pair of jeans, so I immediately decided to try my hand at seeing what I could put on them.

I also have a history of bookbinding and sewing.

The result is the Fuck Book. The Fuck Book is for me to put anything I like in. It’s allowed to be f-ed up, thus the name. And it’s made of old jeans, including the copper thread. The only new material is the green thread - even the paper is ironed-out packing paper from Amazon packages.

In all her glory.

Pattern Recommendation: Persikkavaahto by Liisa Pohjalainen

I don't have great pictures of this one, but for good reason: I made it and immediately started to wear it. There was perhaps a 2-second delay between sewing in the ends (only two!) and putting it on.

Persikkavaahto is a great way to start learning lifelines and lace decreases, and it's free! It's knit in the round, meaning that it's all knit, yarn-overs, and decreases. Here's me making my way through:

Right before fall, so I was excited to wear this to the pumpkin patch!

I used cotton yarns I'd gotten from a second-hand store. They're perfect for this, as they're not heat-retaining like wool, so it made for a light hat to keep my hair under control in the fall! (For more on yarn fibre types, see my post on the subject.) However, I didn't have enough of just one of the yarns, so I mussed about and added stripes instead of going one-colour, just carrying the yarn up inside the hat.

Already on! 

I still wear this hat. Cotton is durable and easily-washed, which is great when you drop your hat in the corn maze... and when you wear it nearly every day!

Lessons Learned: Double-Pointed Needles

Knitting in the round sounds like such a daunting skill to learn. I remember psyching myself up to do my first pair of socks, but I used a circular needle then. I didn't want any of my stitches falling off the needles!

But eventually, I bought a set of double-pointed needles (DPNs, to the knitting crowd) and braced myself for what I was certain was going to be a disaster. It turns out, after casting on, I was able to figure things out just fine, and cast-on was simple after I learned a few tricks.

I started with an extremely simple, small pattern. I wanted something with no new stitches, tiny enough that I could finish it without using extreme amounts of yarn, time, or patience. Knowing I'd probably mess up and frog the whole thing several times, I didn't want to mourn huge amounts of progress lost every time I had to frog again.

My eventual choice was one of the cacti from Lucille Randall's Quick and Easy Cacti. Simple 1x1 rib stitch seemed easy enough, but the in-the-round construction gave me a chance to try out my new needles!

Here are my tips for working with DPNs:

• The easiest mistake to make is to twist up your cast-on between stitches, leaving you with an odd Mobius strip once you're done. My way around this was to cast all the stitches onto one needle. Then I slipped the stitches onto their various needles, evening them out, but I could easily see if I twisted anything before joining in the round. Another way to do the same thing is to cast onto a circular needle of the same size, then slip onto your DPNs. 
• Tighten your stitches after you switch needles. Don't tighten after the first stitch -- it won't hold by itself. Knit two stitches, then tighten the first and the second. The second stitch will hold the tension of the first in place. If you don't watch your tension at the needle changes, there tends to be an odd gap. Sometimes, depending on needle size, there's a gap no matter what you do, in which case blocking helps to even your tension. 
• Knit stitches and purl stitches don't need to be altered each round to achieve stockinette stitch. In other words, one can knit in the round and have a lovely stockinette without ever switching to purl stitch. Reading the pattern, I was very confused when I reached the second round and it didn't start my ribbing with a purl stitch. I ended up re-casting on when I kept trying to start with a purl, getting confused when I ended up with a seed stitch instead! But it turned out I was just not trusting my pattern enough. 

I did end up changing my cactus toward the end; I wanted a more lengthy top, and by this time I was feeling confident, so I did gradual decreases. Here's my little cactus when I finished stuffing it with yarn scraps.

Cute, round, and palm-sized.

I decided he needed a pot to seem quite right, and grabbed a bottle-cap and some twine. After a little super-glue, I had a perfect pincushion!

Pinny is always ready when I need him.

Pattern Recommendation: Little Lamb Baby Bib by Kinga Erdem

You know when you find out a friend is having a baby? There's that jolt of excitement, that thrill of anticipation, and then that sudden moment of "What do I give them?"

Because babies deserve lovely things, all of us are used to the traditions of gifts, but it does tend to become something I stress about -- what is something that no-one else is likely to give? After all, I don't want my gift going in the pile of things baby was going to wear, only for the baby to grow too large before the item was even put on. I'm also practical; as the eldest of five children, I soon realised that pretty baby gifts are often put into the closet in favour of hardy, resilient articles.

For babies, I normally choose acrylic. It's easy-wash, and no new mother wants to hand-wash something a baby has made filthy. Something that fits a growing child works well, but clothing is hard for that. When I realised bibs were an option, it was a brainwave!

I began to search bib patterns and came across an absolutely sweet free crochet with Kinga Erdem's Little Lamb Baby Bib. Personally, it reminds me of Lamb Chop's Play-Along (does anyone else remember that show?).

The bib is an incredibly simple crochet, with the hardest part being the bobbles at the top, but the instructions were clear and I was able to understand the process easily. You start with the basic lamb face and then sew on the ears and details. Here's the face with the ears, mid-sewing process.

Isn't it just adorable? The crochet stitch is tight and the acrylic isn't water absorbent, which means bits of dribble are likely to just stay on the surface for a scrub-off.

The instructions include the eyes, face, and a little bauble border. I changed the smile just a bit because my nose simply didn't want to embroider on straight.

What a lovely lamb!

I gifted the bib to the expecting mum and loved the photos I got later of my godchild in it! There's nothing more gratifying than seeing my work being used and appreciated. I'm sure that it will get passed on, either to the next child along or to another mum who could use a smile!